Sigh.

It's official: we've tried it all.

Gripe water. Colic Ease. Colic Calm. Simethicone (gas drops). Footzoning. Chiropractor. Allergy testing. Four different kinds of formula - ending on a predigested, fancy shmancy formula that costs a freaking arm and a leg. Essential oils. NEVER putting her flat on her back (she has a special wedge with sling attachment so she's always at an angle, even when we're not holding her [which is hardly ever]). Sleeping her on her belly. Antacids. Frequent burping. Frequent, smaller feedings. Massage. I mean...goodness gracious. The point of ridiculousness has been passed.

Baby girl still fidgets and fusses all night and day long. Sometimes erupting into full-blown hysteria that lasts for who knows how long. It feels like forever. It seems like the only time she's really able to get comfortable is when she's vertical in someone's arms. So...that means sleep is basically out of the question - since HER being comfortable inevitably means you're NOT comfortable. Thank the heavens above we're in Utah now and have relief most mornings after long, sleepless nights holding a crying, squirmy, miserable infant. Family, people. Family = God's greatest gift to our little peanut right now. I was crying every single day before we got here. I've cut back to about every other day now. Improvement.

We've had a couple days where it feels like there might be hope...but she always lapses back into having a hurt tummy/unable to pass gas/hating her life within a couple hours. She really is sweet when she doesn't hurt; unfortunately, that isn't very often :/ Bleh.

We're still going to a foot zoner. We go every few days. We're also planning on continuing with the chiropractor. I mean, her pediatrician(s) have told us they've done all they can do and she'll just have to outgrow it (hopefully).

...umm...outgrow it?!

...are we supposed to all make it alive and/or sane to that point...? because I'm ready to be sent to the loony bin. like, today.

So, we'll continue to see whoever tells us there's still something to be done for her. Poor thing. I hate that she spends so much time so uncomfortable and sad.

I've appreciated ALL your comments, messages, texts, etc...with advice from your experience(s). I can't think of ONE thing that someone has recommended that we haven't tried (and/or are continuing to try). Did I miss something in the first paragraph??? Hit me with it. We'll try it.

Shout out to Melissa for the essential oils! I love them. Leanna - thank you for recommending Dr Hershey. He's awesome. Alisa, Rachel, Amie (and I'm sure at least one other person) - I appreciate your foot zoning suggestions! Erin - thank you for the link to the colic article (it lead me to the wedge we purchased for her to sleep/play on!) Janay & Ainsley - for bringing up your experiences with reflux and suggesting an antacid! At least her reflux isn't bothering her as much anymore! Hallelujah :) I'm positive I'm missing people - it's just because I'm so exhausted, not because it hasn't mattered or been appreciated.

I've gone back and read through all your encouraging messages and comments so many times over these past sleepless weeks. Even just the "you can do it!" ones help. THANK YOU for caring. And for reaching out. And for being kind and compassionate.

I'm still listening. Much, much love from our little family to all of you.

xo -

Pictures!

As much as I'm SURE you'd LOVE for me to regale you with tales of sleepless nights, indigestion, reflux and  screaming babies...I'm just going to post pictures instead :)

These were all taken by Nikki (my sister). Enjoy!

FIRST! Please tell me how cute this little face is?! Holy moly we fell in love immediately.

 Earlier that morning:

 I remember thinking,"I don't look that big. My belly is hardly that big at all!" Haha. 

Looking at this picture I'm thinking,"Wow...no wonder I felt so miserable." :)

 Mom's ring.

Note: I delivered my baby at the same hospital my Mom delivered me at! And the same hospital Nikki had her first baby girl at.Tender.

 I'm laughing to keep myself from crying 

(out of terror knowing we were less than an hour away from having a baby).

 Starting to wonder what on earth I got myself into...SO STRESSED at this point!

 Completely freaking out. Sisters!

Another note: Kristina helped SO MUCH the week after Vi was born. I honestly think I would've had a complete nervous breakdown without her. She's an angel.

 Love this one :)

AAAAANND DRUM ROLL PLEASE!!

Here are the pictures Nikki snapped as I was seeing my baby for the first time!! 

I'm so happy she was there to capture this moment. 

I cry every time I look at them. Such a beautiful dream come true.

Isn't she precious?? I think so.

Ok. Now to get back to being a Mom to a very crabby infant. 

xo.