Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Grammar Follow Up

I just added onto my list the blog that Jan and his brother J.D. are starting. And low and behold - look at the correct grammar of Jorgensens' Playbook. (In our list on the right.)

My whiteboard session totally worked! That was the exact principle I was trying to pound into his head.

J.D. - don't tell me if it was you that did that. I'm going to live in my happy world thinking that Jan knows the rules of plural possessives.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

A cure for any bad day...

The next time you're having a poopy day, just watch this video...

..and then repeat after me, don't do drugs.

:) Enjoy!

Jilly Willy Nilly

I've been in love with all forms of "The Bachelor" ever since the first season when that one girl was like "FANTASY SUITE? NO WAY." And left on her high horse.

(ha ha. seriously this is my attitude? what is reality tv doing to me?)

Anyway, this season is no exception. I would just like to take a moment to update all of you on this season's cast:

Jillian wears ridiculously cute clothes but is a little boring and a lot canadian. (Oh, Hi Nikki! Ha ha ha. Canada is awesome and so are you.) Not that there is anything wrong with that, but sometimes when she says "aboot" I can't take her seriously anymore and I picture this guy:

Kiptyn is hot and must win. Did you see his stomach last week? It's flipping amazing. But he's got the nerdy-down-to-earth thing going on too. And Greg Nielsen details his car. That is awesome.

Wes is a jerk, but I kind of feel bad for the way they are spinning things. I don't really like the guy very much mainly because of that obnoxious song he sang the first two lines of over and over again. (Yet I still find myself singing it at random times...?) But I feel a little sympathy for him. He's probably watching it with his family right now (and girlfriend that he had the whole time) feeling like a total jack-A. At least he doesn't feel as dumb as...

Tanner - foot fetish dude. There's no way he actually loves feet that much. It is gross nasty. And, can I just say that Jillian does not have cute feet? Because of this guys obsession we have gotten way too many close-ups of them. And they are not a 9.5, I'll definitely tell you that much.

Jake reminds me of the millions of boys in Provo that take themselves too seriously and whine that they're not married because they are "too perfect." Puh-lease. You are a time-bomb waiting to go off. He is the kind of guy who smiles at the camera and then completely loses it at home because his wife didn't iron his shirt right. And talk about cheesey! The last episode he actually said "Jillian, I'm.... I'm crazy aboutcha." Oh gag.

Reid is hot, sometimes. I can't tell other times. They're acting like he's this big germ-o-phobe when all he is worried about is raw meat. I mean, flip, maybe we should all be a little more concerned. And Jillian is all laughing talking about how she doesn't wash her vegetables? I do not think that is a joking matter. What do they teach people in Canada? Dirt = not tasty.

Michael reminds me of Steph's boyfriend from freshman year. Aka hyper-active and a little obsessive. Ha ha. Love you steph.

I'm getting a little bored of writing about this, not gonna lie. Did I miss your favorite? If it's not Kiptyn, there's not a huge point is discussing him. Hands down, the best guy there. Except Ed! I really liked Ed. And Jillian giving him a hard time to go home and work was a little redonkulous. Seriously, Jillian? Give him a hard time for working and then go back to the pizza entrepreneur and break dance instructor you have to choose from.

Good luck with that.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Wedding Weirdness

Ever since I moved to Provo and all of my friends started getting married, I've had this unhealthy obsession with engagement pictures/wedding pictures/videos/etc.

My roommates and I shared this weird quality until they all got engaged and it wasn't weird anymore and totally legitimate. (Clarification: still totally weird for me, as I am completely un-engaged.)

It got to the point where I was on total strangers' facebook pages looking at their engagement and wedding photos. So weird. I've also been known to shed a tear or two watching wedding videos of people I've never met. Ha ha.

So think of what a flipping cry-baby I am now that I not only know the people, but absolutely ADORE the people getting married? Good heavens.

You have to watch these videos. They are of Ash's fabulous day. Pictures don't do it justice.

(If I could figure out how to embed them on here, I would. Links will have to do.)



I hope those work. They are awesome.

Here is the master behind it all - David Perry. I found his blog and I can feel hours of wasted time in my near future...

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Where's the pole?

This girl will forever be my favorite WipeOut contestant.

I love her.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Yes, I am that annoying.

Jan and I made a discovery the other day. We were watching the bachelorette, loving Jillian in all of her hot-clothes/spunky-personality glory, when the camera showed a part of the date card she'd written to the boys.

And my heart stopped.

She clearly had written "your" where she should have written "you're."

I've been struggling with it ever since.

Seriously, now I have like a spidy-sense to her ridiculous grammar. Just last night she said "Him and I are going to go on a romantic date." BAOWIETHAWEPIGJAWEOIRJ!!!!

I LOVE JILLIAN. But I seriously love her less now because of that. WHY DOES IT MATTER! I wish I could turn that part of me off. I admit it - I am that annoying person that is a nazi about grammar and spelling. I've gotten a lot better at it, at least. I don't say it out loud, I just judge you internally for it. Ha ha.

There are a few exceptions to this, but very few. I understand in a blogging situation or a more casual environment, there will be wacky punctuation and sentence fragments, both of which I have been guilty of on more than one occasion. But the spelling stuff just IRKS me.

I was sharing this frustration with Jan when he was like... how are you dating me?

... he makes a valid point.

Jan is quite possibly the worst speller in the world. Ever. He spells based on straight phonetics. (Sometimes he spells something so wrong that he worries I won't understand him, so he says "sound it out" right afterward. ha ha)

We took MCOM 320 together my last semester at BYU, which is a writing class that has a major grammar/spelling section and test the first few weeks. We sat in a little room in the SAB going over Girls vs. Girl's vs. Girls' for seriously thirty minutes. And he still didn't get it. The only reason we stopped was because we were both so frustrated we were about to get in a dry-erase marker fight.

But why does it not really bother me other than that situation? I correct all of his papers, read his emails (ha ha - not HIS emails. the emails he writes to me. --ahem--), and get a bazillion text messages from him everyday. And he spells things horribly wrong EVERY TIME. But I don't even notice it - it doesn't bug me at all.

I can't figure it out! It makes no sense. A total mystery.

Good job, honey. You've officially created an invisible shield against my "Your spelling is bad and so I like you a little less" attitude.

Except it does bug me when you send the infamous "I love you to" text.


Okay maybe you're not quite as immune as I thought.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Toast with Jam.MM MMM. Mom's cookin'? YUM.

hahaha the title of this post is something Kristina said in a family video...and I'm pretty sure I peed my pants a little just thinking about it. May all of you at some point have children as funny and awesome as she was growing up.

This post is about friendship and a delicious dessert place I recently discovered in Balboa called "Extraordinary Desserts"

Extraordinary Desserts: I read r-a-v-e reviews about it a few months ago online. I planned a date night for myself and my then-boyfriend, but plans fell through and we never got around to going. When Monday rolled around this week and I found myself struggling to keep my emotional baggage from overrunning my life, I recruited a willing manfriend to accompany me down to Balboa to check it out! HOOOLY CRUD, people. It.Is.Amazing. It's small, cozy, and chalk-full of ridiculously decadent and deliciously sweet concoctions.

(photo from flikr)

Anyone who knows me knows that I get a little spend-happy when I'm feeling stressed/sad, so I ended up dropping ~$30 on random desserts - haha! TOTALLY WORTH IT. We tried this German chocolate layer cake with carmel -crunchy-goodness on the outside and strawberries, a warm cream cheese brownie (complete with cute daisy topper and edible gold flaking), and this gigantic strawberry shortcake/torte with fresh berries (pictured above!)...oooohhh deliciousness...You have to go there. Believe me. It was amazing.

(I do NOT recommend ordering three desserts, however...he's 6'8 and was starving, and I LOVE dessert and we still couldn't knock back three between, not even close...).

Fast forward to this morning. I was sitting at my desk, contemplating last night (which was a disastrous, intense night of tears and struggle - woo for exes!). Yuck. As I was drowning in fatalistic thoughts on how futile love and relationships is/ manfriend (mentioned above) walked in. It was a nice to see his friendly smile - along with those cute dimples! - but what made it sweetest of all was what he was carrying! "I was just thinking of you & passing right by your office, so..." he said as he opened up the little white box with an "Extraordinary Desserts" label.

Cream cheese brownie! Complete with cute little daisy topper, dark chocolate ganache and edible gold flakes! Talk about a ray of sunshine in the middle of my dark moment.

So thanks to you, manfriend, for making my day considerably less sucky :)

And thank you, Extraordinary Desserts, for providing my thighs with an extra layer of brownie-induced-love and my tummy with happiness :)

Viva las vegas

Woooooo I'm in vegas! On my birthday! I'm crazy!

Or I'm here for a conference and worked all day. Ha ha. One of the two.

While I was checking in yesterday I saw the funniest thing ever. Ha ha. Meet jan, if he was born with a different skin color.

Hahahahahahahahahahaha. :)

Thanks wags for the shout out. Even though all of them were equally mean as they were nice. Haha. :)

Jan came down for my birthday and it was so fun. We went to serendipity and walked the strip and did all of that. And then I was really tired and went to bed before midnight. So cool.

I'm officially 22 and an old woman. My body is already susceptible to the hazards of old age and it's only been a day since I kissed my youth goodbye! Maybe someone should get me a walker for my birthday present. I think I developed arthritis last night while I slept. And I woke up with age spots on my face and hearing aids in my ears.

Wait what? I'm still single too? There's no ring on my finger?

I hadn't even noticed.

-- Post From My iPhone

Wednesday, June 10, 2009


I was just reading through some old posts on this blog and I thought to myself..."Kristina did such a good job making this blog. It really is adorable."

And then I thought to myself, "Kristina deserves a shout out."


Here are a couple stories that I love so much about Kristina:

-When I was 16 and having an emotional meltdown over my first boyfriend (for the record, the word 'meltdown' is not even close to what I was having - it was Armageddon for my heart). Kristina, who was 12, came into my room and sat with me. I remember her putting her arms around me as I sobbed and telling me it was going to be alright. Wow. I'm getting a bit teary right now just thinking about it. She was my little best friend through that tough time.

-We had a dog named Pepper all growing up. She was the sweetest little shelti puppy ever. When we were little, Nikki and I would make her attack Kristina for fun. Haha! So mean. She'd get so scared and we'd laaaaugh and laugh. Sorry, Rae :)

-I used to HATE going to her piano recitals. It's torture for siblings. Parents should threaten piano recitals instead of grounding. Anyways. Now that we're older, however, I really appreciate all those hours she spent practicing (haha - especially the time I video-taped her audition piece for Junior Miss...four hours later...) because I absolutely love listening to her play. Thanks for always being down to accompany me :)

-This weekend I was visiting Utah and had to laugh as she regaled me with a tale about how she lost her crock pot and it aaalmost ruined her Sunday. Really, Kristina? Who are you?? Do you have seven kids?! THEN WHY DO YOU HAVE A CROCK POT. Once I ate the yummy burrito meat she cooked in said missing crock pot (it was at Jan's house...), however, I changed my tune. She makes dinner like a little mini-mom. Delish and nutrish. (<-but more delish than nutrish...)

-I LOVE watching family videos of her as a little kid. She has this crazy white-blonde troll hair that sticks out every which way (until she got old enough to rock a sweet mullet - my mom gave us the most awesome permed/mullety hairdo's eeeevverrrr), a big belly that sticks out over her diaper, cute little squinty eyes and brown baby skin. So cute. And awkward. And singing "OH IIII, OOooohhh IIIiiiIII!" at the top of her lungs. Or "It's ALL OF OURSSS". Or "Time to Goober up!". Or "Watch how I ride this...this BABY". Love love love.

There are soo many others! BUT I'M RUNNING OUT OF TIME AT WORK. Real quick:
-Quoting movie trivia (this goes for all my ridiculously funny sisters).
-Blowing our matching flat irons out in London.
-Writing me a happy note the night I had to sit in a jail cell for 'Every 15 Minutes'.
-Leading oddly similar love-lives. Not in a good way, unfortunately...

SOO I started writing this blog to honestly just appreciate Kristina for how legit she is, but halfway through I realized that this happy Kristina blog coincides with her BIRTHDAY TODAY!!

I vote I get double nice points :) YAY YAY FOR KRISTINEE RAE'S DAY!!

I hope you have an awesome night!! Kiss your hot man candy & live large. :) I LOVE YOU.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

My Owesome Mom

Ha ha. I tried for like ten minutes to come up with an "O" word that fits my mom, but I could only come up with silly ones. Obnoxious, Over-the-top, Outrageous... Owesome is about as good as I'm going to get. Since this is a birthday post so I'm being nice. :)

I love my mom! When I think about her, I tear up a little bit. She's gone through the hardest time the last two years, but she is such a fighter.

Growing up, I was never the girl that always fought with her mom. We've always gotten along really well, and some of my favorite memories are with her dorky self. (One of the best was when she took me to New York after we found out about my scholarship. We went shopping, stayed downtown in a crazy little hotel, and saw shows every single day. It was so awesome.)

You'd think I wouldn't have to give her a birthday present since I gave her the BEST birthday present EVER 22 years ago (ME), but I'm just that nice, so I will. :)
Here are reasons I love my mom:

- She is kind of like a mullet: rather than business on top/party on bottom, she is business on the outside/party on the inside. If you don't know her very well, you just see a put-together, professional lady. Once you get to know her, you see the crazy, funny, likes-to-annoy-you-for-the-heck-of-it party animal. It's awesome.

- Everytime she calls my phone she starts with "Rae rae, shmae shmae?" And it makes me happy.

- She always knows what to do. No matter the situation or problem, she either knows the answer or knows who to call to get the answer. I always call my mom first whenever I have any kind of issue or need help and she always comes through.

- She is so good at everything she does. She's a flipping amazing cook (and has inspired me to be a good-cooking-mom, too), she always has a clean house, and she is awesome at all of her callings and especially her jobs. You should see her with the kids at Children's Chorus - they absolutely adore her. She's so good with kids.

- Nikki wrote a post about my dad for his birthday, and his own vocabulary he has. Well dear old mom has the same thing, which we all tease her about but all say, too. Since we're all turning into her. Examples, you ask?

*Burrzy-Wurrzy: It's cold.
*Freaky-weird: That's crazy!
*Shooty-darn-darn: Dang it.
*Mmm. Mm hmm. That's... that's yum.: I like this food.
*Yipee Hoo!: I am excited.
*Will you get the uh.... it's on the ah.... over by the....: Please read my mind and get that thing for me.
*If you couldn't breathe like me... : Don't judge me for picking my nose.

- She screams when she sneezes. I don't know why I love this about her, but I do.

- She always stocks up on awesome food for me when I come home, and makes me texas sheet cake.

- She has a really close relationship with Jesus Christ. She's not super super open about it, but when she does open up you can feel her deep love for the Gospel and her dedication to doing what's right. She's always been a goody-too-shoes, but taught me that that isn't such a bad thing. And she made me want to be that way, too.

There are a lot more, but I'll leave that for a different time.

Love you mom! Happy Birthday!

Monday, June 8, 2009

Food for Thought

Anyone who watches Seinfeld knows that Jerry is famous for breaking up with girls for the stupidest reasons. (Hi all boys in Provo over the age of 26! Ha ha. Just Kidding. Okay, not really kidding.)

Anyway, one of my favorite reasons is when he dumps his girlfriend because she eats her peas one and a time. He's so upset and says to George "I've seen her eat corn niblets... she scooped them! That's whats so vexing." (Ha ha! Oh Jerry.) That one habit just drives him up the wall and he can't take it.

We've all been in situations where someone's odd eating habits bother us, offend us, gross us out, whatever. But I would like to dedicate this post to people who's eating habits actually enhance my eating experience - Ashley Archibald and my co-blogger, Calee.

If any of you have had the blessing of eating with Ash, you know exactly what I'm talking about right now. Every meal she has, whether it's a plate full of Happy Sumo sushi or a nasty old Balance Bar, she acts like its the best thing that's ever happened to her. She closes her eyes and "mmm"s and "ahhh"s over every bite. It's like she's never had food before.

Ash has gone to her fair share of nice restaurants, but some of her favorite things to eat are plain old popcorn, california rolls, balance bars, 7-layer dip, sherbet ice cream with chocolate sprinkles, and especially chocolate chips straight from the bag. She has this crazy way of COMPLETELY enjoying every bite, and it makes everyone around her just a little more appreciative of the meal. It's awesome.

Calee's special habit is actually what inspired this post. I was taking her to the airport this morning and I made us some peanut butter toast for the drive down. (Props to ash and andrew for leaving the super chunk PB. I never buy any and Calee loves the stuff.)

I stopped at a stoplight and there was a little lull in conversation. Calee was sitting in the passenger seat, happily munching away on her chunky peanut butter toast. It was possibly the noisiest chewing I've ever heard. But not in a ew-thats-gross way, more in a wow, she's really enjoying that way.

Her little happy crunch gave me a little happy feeling. And now that I think of it, Calee is really loud when she's eating anything. She's just a very non-offensive, noisy eater.

So chew on, noisy eaters of the world. I wouldn't break up with you for it. (Just don't date Jerry.)

Friday, June 5, 2009

Not your average birthday present

It's my birthday next week and I am so excited. Even though I have finally come to realize that the Provo-flu has gotten to me and it makes me feel disgustingly old and cat-lady-ish to be turning 22 and have all of my friends married/going on missions.

Maybe you should buy me this to make me feel better. Delicious AND deadly.

The description is pretty funny. Apparently a No-No. Who'da thunk?

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