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Thursday, July 30, 2015

I Am Enough


I think God sometimes allows us struggle to force us into asking people for help.

Don't misunderstand me...I'm constantly asking God for help. I would actually really appreciate it if He would just come help me personally every time I pray - instead of sending people to help me. I get so awkward when I need help from people. It's so uncomfortable. Admitting that we need help to anyone other than God somehow feels like we're admitting defeat, or weakness, sometimes, doesn't it?

Writing 'I Am Enough' was one of those situations for me.

Remember the disappointing phone call I had with Bart that prompted me to write "Possible"?

A similar phone call happened several months later - as recording-time was fast approaching. We had chosen songs for the EP, booked the studio, contracted some of my favorite people to play on the record, and were sitting pretty...or so I thought.

As fate would have it, I was tasked with writing a handful of NEW songs for consideration just a few weeks before we were scheduled to cut the album. 

I knew I was going to need  help from someone...and I was absolutely dreading it.

Enter: the incredibly talented and unbelievably kind Justin Cash. (have you heard his music?! do yourself a favor and look him up immediately. and then be his best friend bc you'll seriously never meet a nicer person.) We had never written together before, but I had performed with him on the Time Out for Women tour and - let me tell you - he is bananas talented. He was gracious enough to spend some time and energy helping me get out of my songwriting funk.

After tons of emails and song ideas being bounced around, I sent him the idea for "I Am Enough" as the hook of a song. 

I wanted to write a song based around the idea of being enough because, let's be real, being a woman who really believes she IS enough these days can be challenging, right?? We're sent so many mixed messages about loving who we are but then we're simultaneously taught to never 'settle' - we need to be more confident, more educated, more spiritual, more desired than the next woman. We often base our worth on how we appear physically - whether we're thin and loving it/hating it, super muscular and loving it/hating it, the clothes we wear, the way our make up looks, our hair, shoes, accessories, etc. If we aren't valuing ourselves on how we appear physically, then it's intellectually or financially that we compare, compare, compare all day long - whether we think we're better OR worse than whoever else. 

Guys.

We've got. to. stop. it. 

anyone else out there know what I'm talking about??

*note: I'm 100% guilty of doing this and I try everyday to love myself the way I believe God loves each of His children; not only for myself, but for my daughter who will watch and learn how to love herself based on how I love myself.

After mulling the hook idea over, Justin sent me his brilliant idea for the first verse and chorus. It was exactly what I had wanted to write myself but couldn't make happen on my own. I wrote the second verse and bridge and BOOM. Co-writing success story!

You may think it's kind of ironic that a song about being enough was born from a situation when I definitely needed help and, therefore, wasn't - in fact - enough. Haha. I didn't have enough creativity, I didn't have enough energy...I wasn't able to write that song on my own. 

If you read the lyrics, though, that's kind of what the song is all about: even when we're flawed and failing, we are enough because we are His. God created each of us, and believes in and loves each of us. Because of Him, we ARE enough - no matter how much help we need along the way.

If I was a painting
I would be the kind of painting
That you paint a million times before it's right
Brush strokes on a canvas
It's supposed to be a sunset
But it looks like pink and orange had a fight

But greatness doesn't happen overnight...

I am enough
I am enough
Though I'm far away from perfect
There is more beneath the surface
I'm still rough
But I am enough
I am not yet what I could be
But I'm happy just to be me
I'm enough

If I were a sculpture
I would be the kind of sculpture
That looks really great from three feet further back
Coming closer to me
Imperfection is all that you'd see
Chipped and flawed, but learning to like me like that

I'm not there yet, but I'm on the right track

I am enough
I am enough
Though I'm far away from perfect
There is more beneath the surface
I'm still rough
But I am enough
I am not yet what I could be
But I'm happy just to be me
I'm enough

It might be true - I've still got a little way to go
Some ways to grow
But each day I'm better
I keep a skip in my step walking down the road
Each day try a little more
To remind the woman in the mirror

I'm enough
I am enough
Though I'm far away from perfect
There is more beneath the surface
I'm still rough
But I am enough
I am not yet what I could be
But I'm happy just to be me
I'm enough
You, my friend, are enough. 

If you ever find yourself struggling to feel and believe that you are enough, I invite you to join me in listening to this song on repeat to remind ourselves.

xo.

1 comment :

Anonymous said...

I love this song! Plus you seriously have the happiest singing voice. I can hear you smiling. Isn't it funny how so many of our problems are rooted in our feelings of inadequacy and our pride won't allow us to do anything to fix it? Let's give Satan a swift kick in the pants and send him out the door! (Seriously, I just blogged about a similar topic today so apparently it's something we women think about all the time!)

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