Monday, August 24, 2009


I was telling a friend yesterday how strange I am. Haha. Not like that is news to anyone, right? But really, it is weird that I have two sides of myself that are so different.

One part is very analytical and calculating - I like to hear the reasoning behind things and plan things out and do everything on my own since I'm the only person I can rely on 100%. Those things then make me a little bit cynical.

At the same time, however, I have a really deep faith. I've found myself in situations a lot of times (and especially recently) where I don't necessarily have all of the answers, but I'm willing to move forward anyway. When other people in my life have really struggled with finding the faith to make big decisions, I for some reason have found it very easy to just put things in the Lord's hands and trust it will be okay. All of those things make me really hopeful.

Isn't that strange? I don't know which side will win out. Actually I don't think one side has to win - I like both sides of myself. I think they keep me really level-headed.

The faith/hope side of myself has been working in overdrive a bit lately. And is actually pretty darn burnt out. And the calculating/cynical side of me took over a little bit today. I went to school and didn't get into any of the classes I needed. I don't really know what my other options are or where I should go or what I should do at this point.

But the faith/hope kristina came to the rescue, and I started getting little reminders. Reminders that the hot sun that was making me sweaty and uncomfortable as I hiked back and forth between buildings, only to turn right around again, was really part of an absolutely beautiful day with gorgeous weather; something I can get used to now that I'm down here. I got a reminder that meeting a random old man at the dog park and talking to him was a really good way to spend an hour - especially since I could feel his loneliness alleviate a little bit.

I could keep going right now - there were actually a lot of things that happened today that made me remember. But the details aren't really important. The fact of the matter is that I am okay and things are good, and I need to just accept the lows as they come. And love it.

Here is a message from Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin about just that. It's called "Come what may, and love it." Before he passed away last year, he was an Apostle of God - just like Peter, James and John were when Jesus Christ was on the Earth. If you're interested to know more about how the same church Christ established when he walked the Earth has been restored - go here: That is exactly where my hope and faith come from.

There are a lot more messages and talks where that came from. I just thought it was a really fitting message for where I am right now - and I'm sure with this economy and all of the uncertainty right now, everyone could use a little dose.

Check out more at the church's new youtube channel -


No comments :

Blog Design by Get Polished